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Chris Archer-Orbit ‘feud’ escalates with water balloon ambush (vid)

The “feud” between Tampa Bay Rays pitcher Chris Archer and Houston Astros mascot Orbit was kicked up a notch on Wednesday night thanks to a well-executed water balloon ambush.

And this time around — unlike Orbit’s thwarted gastrointestinal sabotage earlier this week — the Astros mascot was on the receiving end of the silly skullduggery.

Before we get to the water balloon barrage perpetrated by Archer and some Rays teammates, some backstory. It all started on Monday when Archer issued a provocation via a “Declaration of Unfriendliness.”

It read:

Whereas general mischief and rascality has been among Orbit’s repeated trespasses, Chris Archer is hereby resolved to carry on a campaign of pranks, gags and high jinks in retaliation which include, but are not limited to, use of objects such as:

Water balloons

Whipped pies

Silly string

Small motorized vehicles


Hand-crafted signage

And any of the considerable resources of a Major League clubhouse.

This resolution is authorized,

Chris Archer

Orbit promptly crumpled up the Declaration and on Wednesday night, revenge was on the itinerary.

Archer set up a ruse to distract Orbit, presenting the mascot with an honorary degree from the “University of Raymond.”

After Archer lulled Orbit into a false sense of security, Rays players ambushed the mascot with a water balloon barrage.

Oh, it’s on, folks. On like Donkey Kong.

Sadly for Orbit, the Astros and Rays don’t square off again this season, absent a potential showdown in the postseason. If that’s the case, Orbit has a long time to come up with the perfect plan to exact his revenge.