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Von Miller has some wild predictions about humankind’s evolution


Von Miller has cultivated a reputation of being a somewhat eccentric individual with a unique worldview and unorthodox opinions concerning matters outside the world of football. The Denver Broncos superstar’s recent off-the-wall predictions concerning the continued evolution of humankind won’t alter that perception one iota.

Miller recently discussed what he believes is in store for humans over the next several millennia during an interview with The Ringer that explores his wonderful weirdness. Suffice to say, Miller believes some big evolutionary changes are coming our way.

“In the next 5,000 years there won’t be any more freckles or red hair,” Miller opined. “That’s the way humans are evolving.”

“We will all eventually be bald, too,” he claimed. “We lose hair because it helps us cool our brains faster. The smarter we get, the less hair we need, because our brains need to be cool. Also, we will lose another toe. We will have four toes.”

Aside from his fascination with human evolution, Miller also devotes a lot of time to the studying the extinction of species and discussing the possibility of life elsewhere in the galaxy and beyond.

A discussion between Miller and San Francisco 49ers defensive tackle Tony Jerod-Eddie, a close friend, apparently played out as follows:

“What do you think living species on Pluto would be like?” Jerod-Eddie says Miller asked him this summer.

“Bro, I don’t know and I don’t care,” Jerod-Eddie responded.

“Just think about it,” Miller shot back. “Just think what living beings on other planets would be like.”

It would be interesting to hear Miller’s views on evolutionary biology’s contrasting theories of punctuated equilibrium and phyletic gradualism. But for now, we’ll just have to be happy to know that Miller thinks we’ll all be bald with four toes. Or something.

“It’s not like I’ll be around for this,” Miller says of his revolutionary evolutionary predictions. “But I think it’s dope.”

Dope, indeed.

[Sporting News]