Sportress of Blogitude

Here’s Houston Astros mascot Orbit wearing only underwear, everyone (photo)


After over a decade away after he “hitched a ride on the space shuttle Discovery to visit his home back in the Grand Slam Galaxy,” Orbit, the beloved former mascot of the Houston Astros, made his triumphant return to planet Earth and the team in 2012.

Junction Jack, the team’s mascot from 2000-2012, allegedly stepped down and “retired to a carrot ranch in the hill country of Texas,” meaning Orbit was back in business.

A photo that surfaced on the interwebs on Tuesday may reveal that Orbit’s bizarre conduct may have prompted the Astros to insist that Orbit take a Don Draper-esque “sabbatical” from the organization.

Here’s Orbit wearing only underwear, people.


Question: Why does a mascot that doesn’t typically wear any “bottoms,” be they pants, shorts or otherwise, have to wear underwear? To wit:


Weird, wild stuff, man. Seeing Orbit in tighty-whities is akin to seeing Donald Duck dressed only in a Speedo. Actually, it’s nothing like that. What a disturbing thought. What in the hell is wrong with me?

(image via @JWerthsBeard)