Sportress of Blogitude

Brian Wilson: You, my friend, have crossed the line that divides man and bum (photo)


In a lengthy process in which a transformation was made from eccentric bad boy into an unkempt, disheveled cretin, Los Angeles Dodgers relief pitcher Brian Wilson finally has completed his devolution from man to bum.

Wilson’s removal of his hat during Sunday’s game against the San Diego Padres revealed an abject, matted mess of nasty, raggy and clearly unwashed hair. Truly grody.


Nearly on the same level of disaster was Wilson’s performance on the mound. Wilson threw 25 pitches to five Padres hitters and retired none of them, including giving up a game-tying homer to Seth Smith, the first batter he faced.

Wilson ultimately surrendered three runs, two of them earned. Bu the time he walked off the mound, the Dodgers’ one-run lead was gone and the team went on to lose 3-1.

Wilson described the pitch that Smith deposited into the seats, via the AP report (by way of Big League Stew):

Wilson said it was tough to deal with because Ryu ”pitched such a marvelous game. It’s a hard one to swallow.”

He said he threw a pitch ”that was a little bit uncharacteristic of me. Right then and there, the tire deflated.”

Fair enough. Relief pitchers are bound to come in and not be at their best and blow a game for the team. But what may be remembered most about Wilson on Sunday was his incredibly disheveled appearance. While he arrived at it differently than George Costanza and through different means…

… Brian Wilson, you, my friend, have crossed the line that divides man and bum.

[H/T BSO, images via @sharapovasthigh, @GrandPaD]