Sportress of Blogitude


That’s nuts: Woman uses Nike+ app to ‘draw’ a penis on a football field (photo)


(click to enlarge — if it were only that easy)

Ah, reddit. Where else could a story be found about how an offer of $20  results in someone actually using the Nike+ app to “draw” a penis on a football field? Wait, don’t answer that.

Here’s the jizz, er, gist: reddit user Alyxchosen reports that an offer of $20 was made to a friend if she would use the Nike+ app, which tracks, charts and maps a runner’s, um, run, to draw a penis. In a hilarious thread fittingly entitled, “Told my friend is give her $20 if she drew a penis for me with her Nike run. I didn’t think I’d actually have to pay up…,” not only it is revealed that fellow reddit user sglider12 accomplished the feat, a wonderful bit of banter ensued chock-full of puns and other assorted nonsense.

As you can see, the image of the penis on a football field is remarkably accurate and well-done. sglider12 indicates that she accomplished the feat by donging doing the following: “I took a photo of a football field and then sketched a quick penis over it to get an idea, then I followed the lines.” Fantastic. And what did she get for her efforts? A $20 Amazon card. Not too shabby. The penis probably wasn’t that hard, either. To draw, that is.

The Nike+ app dong-drawer also promised she would post a photo of a Nike+ vagina, but thus far, that appears to be “lip service.”

Question: Did she buy her running shoes at Dick’s Sporting Goods?

But seriously, if I tried to do that — running around a track in order to draw a penis utilizing the Nike+ app — I’d probably last only about two minutes…

Wait. What?