Sportress of Blogitude

NOOOOOOOO!!!! Tom Brady has a black eye! Who did it? Why did this happen? (photos)

In a day that surely will live in Dreamboat infamy, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady showed up for his Wednesday media session sporting a ghastly black eye.

Additional photo documenting the psychologically jarring disaster below.

GAH! Terrible. Utterly, utterly terrible.

Okay, to be fair, the only reason it can be referred to as a “ghastly” black eye as it was above is because who it happened to and how it has horribly marred Tommy’s otherwise flawless visage. Slap that black eye on me and it likely would enhance my looks:

“Say, Jason, you look nice today. Doing something different?”

“Yeah, I have a black eye.”

“Looks great. Keep it up.”

(punches self in other eye)

Anyway, no one knows at this time the cause of the shiner, nor the who/what/when/where/why/hows such a travesty occurred. But believe you me, we will all remember the moment we learned that Tom Brady suffered a black eye.

[H/T For the Win]