Alex Ovechkin’s new Gillette commercial chock-full of Ovie goodness (video)

It’s been awhile since Washington Capitals superstar Alexander Ovechkin has graced the pages here at SoB. The lengthy lockout had a lot to do with that, obviously, but that doesn’t take away from the fact that a man we have affectionately referred to in the past as “Unfrozen Caveman Hockey Player” has been a longtime favorite of this here site (this might be my favorite — or maybe this one), and I am relieved he has made a triumphant return.

And what a return it is. Ovechkin, who has been endorsing the company’s products since 2010, stars in a new commercial for Gillette. And it’s in Russian, which makes it that much more fantastic.

The description of the video, translated by Russian Machine Never Breaks:

And now Gilette Fusion ProGlider is in Ovechkin’s hands!  With a nimble move he changes the whole flow of the game!  You can see the brazen arrogance of a big city denizen!  A counterattack!  What is he doing?! Ovechkin is playing in the zone of a chivalrous intellectual… Shush!!!…An aficionado of Kafka and long walks… A pass!  And now he is on the beach!  What’s going to happen next?!  A pass into the slot… he shoots!..  Now, my friends, the game is getting serious.  The situation is tense… what a chance!…  Just a few seconds to victory!  Ovechkin goes to the net and radically changes his style!   Here is the moment of truth! A-a-a-a-a-n-d!….  He scores!  Sasha, this is your win!!!!

Mark my words, I will be incorporating the phrase “playing the zone of a chivalrous intellectual” as a way to describe myself in every possible conversation. I just have to remember to be wearing pants when I do so. Note to self…

Here’s some GIFs of the ad, courtesy of flawlessrussians: