Sportress of Blogitude

Bobby Valentine reads text while cycling, injured during Central Park bike ride

One could reasonably argue that Bobby Valentine’s brief tenure as the manager of the Boston Red Sox has been an unmitigated disaster. And that might be putting it mildly. Sitting at an abysmal 69-92 with one game left on the schedule, the Red Sox have been essentially irrelevant for the balance of the season and that’s only half of the story of Valentine’s sublimely craptastic odyssey he has endured trying to navigate his way through a terrible season in Boston. I imagine the end of the season can’t come soon enough for Valentine.

To add injury to insult comes news that Bobby V. sustained injuries to his knees and hips on Tuesday during a bike ride around New York’s Central Park. Valentine, in New York for a three-game series to close out the season, foolishly was attempting to multitask during his bike-riding jaunt through the park, inexplicably attempting to read a text message while cycling. Derp.

Valentine, an avid cyclist who routinely rides his bike to Fenway Park for home games, crashed his bike after reading a text message from Red Sox second baseman Dustin Pedroia. According to a report from The New York Times, when Valentine looked up after reading the text, he was bearing down on a pair of French tourists walking in front of him. Valentine swerved, skidded on a wet and slippery path, careened down a hill and ultimately ending with Valentine flying over the handlebars near a Central Park reservoir.

Valentine took responsibility for his irresponsible behavior, saying, ““I shouldn’t have been reading a text while I was riding,” adding, “That’s the wrong thing to do. But at least I was wearing my helmet.”

Yes, definitely a good thing he was wearing his helmet. But next time, it might be best if Valentine waited to read text messages until he was off his bike. One never knows when a couple of French tourists might be directly in front of you, giving rise to a farcical — and, since he emerged from it relatively unscathed, comical — scene that ends with Bobby V. sitting dazed, confused and embarrassed in a ditch at the bottom of a hill.