Sportress of Blogitude

DERP: Eli Manning Asked Who He Would Want To Portray Him In A Movie (Video)

Jeez, they’ll hand out Super Bowl media credentials to anyone, even half-witted entertainment gossip shows. And because of this fact, players who are competing in the Super Bowl will continue to suffer under the barrage of idiotic, inane inquiries sputtering out the mouths of halfwits.

Case in point: here’s Eli Manning fielding a (what I am sure they believed) thought-provoking question from some gal from Access Hollywood. Speaking of that show, hey, whatever happened to Pat O’Brien? Oh wait. Never mind.

Moving on, above you can see Manning play the role of good sport and appears to be genuinely trying to answer her question. After hemming and hawing and throwing in a self-deprecating dig at his relative handsomeness to Hollywood types, he comes up with James Van Der Beek due to the aforementioned actor’s quarterback role in Varsity Blues.

I can see why Eli gave that response, but since Manning appears to want an actor who has played quarterback before in a movie, there were so many other much better options out there of actors who have portrayed QBs on the silver screen. And if you ask me, a more suitable response would have been Jason London, who played Randall “Pink” Floyd in Dazed and Confused. Young, brash, devil-may-care attitude. Not too bad, although there really isn’t any footage of him actually playing football and was it him or his twin brother who has the real bad chemical abuse problem and once faked his own kidnapping?

Huh. Either way, let’s move away from that family and go with Keanu Reeves, who portrayed a star QB not once, but twice: as Shane “Footsteps” Falco in The Replacements and as Johnny Utah in Point Break.

Oh. Wait. If I recall correctly, Reeves is left-handed, which wouldn’t work for Eli. Too bad for Keanu that no one ever asked Scottie Mitchell who he’d want to portray him in a movie. Or any other left-handed quarterback, for that matter, which proves my theory once again: left-handed people are weird.