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College Basketball

After Blowout Loss To Ohio State, Mike Krzyzewski Became Infatuated With Butts

"I got three butts. Do you want a fourth?"

The No. 3-ranked Duke Blue Devils were in Columbus, Ohio on Tuesday night to take on the No. 2 Ohio State Buckeyes in what was originally considered — at least before tipoff — as one of the more tantalizing games on the early college basketball schedule. What resulted was nothing short of total dominance by the Buckeyes, who thrashed the Blue Devils by the lopsided score of 85-63. While it was not shocking that the home team prevailed in one of the marquee match-Mike Krzyzewskups of the ACC-Big Ten Challenge, how easily Ohio State handled Duke was a bit surprising, so much so that Mike Krzyzewski would have had some difficulty explaining exactly what transpired on the court if it hadn’t been for the word, “butt.”

To wit (via FOX Sports Ohio):

“Sometimes, you just get your butt kicked. I’ve had my butt kicked before, and we’ve kicked some butt. Tonight, my butt is sore.”

Impressive. In only 23 words, Coach K managed to incorporate the word “butt” an astounding four times. That’s commitment to — nay, obsession with — butts. A measured response, to be sure. In other words, some days are good, others? Not so good. But that sure is a lot of butts, isn’t it? But to be fair, as the great philosopher Pee Wee Herman once said, “Everyone I know has a big butt.” So come on, Coach K, let’s talk about your big butt. And how it got kicked and is quite sore now.