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Wake N’ Blog: Easily-Confused Family Calls 911 After Getting Lost In Corn Maze

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• The following exchange occurred between the mother of a family who got lost in a supposedly creepy corn maze outside of Salem, MA and a 911 operator:

Woman: “Hi, I just called. I’m still stuck at Connors Farms. I don’t see anybody. I am really scared. It’s really dark and we’ve got a 3-week-old baby with us.”
Dispatcher: “Just relax. Calm down. Your husband is with you right?”
Woman: “Yes, but my baby?”
Dispatcher: “OK. I understand and the police officer is on the way.”
Woman: “We thought this would be fun. Instead it’s a nightmare. I don’t know what made us do this. It was daytime when we came in. And I never take my daughter out. This is the first time. Never again.”

Ha. Slack-jawed yokels. [msnbc]

• Michael Vick is none-too-pleased with Peter King’s comments. Join the club. [Shutdown Corner]

• Is Kevin Youkilis dating Tom Brady’s sister question mark? [Larry Brown Sports]

• World record-holding Squash ball hitting guy drills his brother in the back, leaves a hole. [Busted Coverage]

• The reaction to LeBron’s tweet about playing in the NFL was predictably snarky. [Off the Bench]

• Extreme hot tubbing looks far too extreme for this hombre. [With Leather]

• The NBA lockout has totally harshed President Obama’s mellow. [Ball Don’t Lie]

• The 14 greatest foul ball fails of all-time. [Ranker]

• How LeBron James and George W. Bush have a lot in common. [Pick-and-Pop Culture]

• The Minnesota Vikings cheerleaders visited the Air Force. [Unathletic]

• The St. Louis Cardinals Rally Squirrel: A Study. [Big League Stew]

• NFL.com keeps on bringing the hard-hitting news. [The Sports Hernia Blog]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Lone Post On Jaguars Fan Message Board Requests Directions To Stadium