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Wake N’ Blog: Arkansas Town On The Lookout For Possible Serial Toe-Sucker

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• Police in Conway, Arkansas have received complaints from two women who claim a man approached them and asked to suck on their toes. One of the alleged victims, an 83-year-old woman sitting on her porch, said a man came up to her, said he liked her feet, removed her shoe and began sucking on her toes. The other victim, a woman at a mall who was informed by the toe-sucker that “her toes are so long and succulent,” said the assailant had “messed up toes.” So, it’s a crime inspired by jealousy, perhaps? [Yahoo!]

• A welcome sight: after suffering a seizure during the team’s game last Saturday, Minnesota Gophers coach Jerry Kill was back at practice Thursday. [SB Nation]

• Provocative headline: “World Cup rugby player accused of groping woman during dwarf-tossing contest” [Off the Bench]

• The BYU Cougars have released a video instructing its football fans how to cheer correctly. [Larry Brown Sports]

• A 7-foot Russian boxer is obsessed with tracking down a Bigfoot. Who tweets. [With Leather]

• Carmelo Anthony’s latest signature Jordans are pretty sweet. [The Basketball Jones]

• Shaquille O’Neal has gone on record that he will never be a contestant on Dancing With The Stars. Good to know. [Ball Don’t Lie]

• Better Dirk Nowitzki tattoo: the back tat or the ass tat? You be the judge. [Busted Coverage]

• If the fall movies were about sports. [Sports Pickle]

• Of course Tommy from Quinzee has some thoughts regarding Tom Brady’s comments about Patriots fans needing to get “lubed up.” [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

• The gals from the Cal basketball team sing and dance to Montell Jordan. Awkwardly. [Outside the Boxscore]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Opinion: Well, I Guess I’ll Just Take My Business To Another Soulless Multinational Corporation (by Mary-Lynn Davies)