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Wake N’ Blog: Runaway Rooster Eludes Police By Jumping Off Bridge

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• A Michigan State Police trooper spent a part of his Thursday morning attempting to wrangle a runaway rooster. Described by a fellow trooper as a “big, fat, juicy rooster,” the bird ultimately took a flying leap off a bridge to evade the trooper. It was like that scene in The Fugitive, I bet. “I DIDN’T KILL MY HEN!!” (jumps) [azcentral]

• Now’s your chance: Derek Jeter and the lovely Minka Kelly have split up. Which one of these newly-single people you set your sights on is up to you. I won’t judge. [Larry Brown Sports]

• Oh, Lenny: the complete and utter mess that is Lenny Dykstra has been charged with indecent exposure. [Rumors & Rants]

• Fred Couples has officially named Tiger Woods a member of the President’s Cup team. [Devil Ball Golf]

• Jim Thome is back playing for the Cleveland Indians. And that seems right. [Big League Stew]

• Has the national anthem jumped the shark? My good friend Rick discusses that very question in the latest edition of “Rick’s Cafe.” [Off the Bench]

• The 25 greatest sports corn maze moments in farming history. Great stuff. [Busted Coverage]

• Video: Little Leaguer hit in the face is at first not funny, then turns extremely funny. [With Leather]

• Check out BBoy McCoy, the break-dancing ballboy. [Outside the Boxscore]

• Ha ha, LeBron James lost in a game of Knockout to a 16-year-old. [Sharapova’s Thigh]

• MLB’s Hurricane Survival Plan. [TAUNTR]

• Time for another edition of KSK’s Sex/Fantasy Football Mailbag. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Insane Moron Draws Conclusion From NFL Preseason Game (Spoiler Alert: A photo of ESPN’s Mark Schlereth accompanies the article – ha!)