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Sweet Fancy Moses & Sweet Sassy Molassey! Check Out Brian Wilson’s ESPYs Outfit

Sorry, that nightmare fuel image required both of those exclamations. San Francisco Giants closer and Major League Baseball’s resident oddball Brian Wilson pulled out all the stops and continued his assault on normalcy with this outrageous outfit that he picked out for his stroll down the red carpet on his way into the ESPYs tonight. Jeez Louise, Mr. Blackwell is probably spinning in his grave. In joy. I just hope Erin Andrews didn’t wear the same thing. Can you imagine???

With that said, that is so wrong on so many levels. Also: it’s awesome. Well done, Mr. Wilson.

People will probably refer to it as some kind of skin tight, spandex tuxedo, but to me, he kind of looks like a penguin. A penguin who would have to go door-to-door to meet all his new neighbors upon moving in, if you know what I’m getting at.

Hoo boy. That is all.

UPDATE: Here’s another pic. Just for the hell of it:

(via)

And another (via):

I’m not going to waste my time actually watching ESPN’s bastardized version of an awards show, but even so, I can say without any reluctance whatsoever that Brian Wilson just won the ESPYs.

[image via]