Sportress of Blogitude

ESPN+ Free Trial!

Which Is More Terrifying: The Clown From ‘Poltergeist’ Or This Kevin Youkilis Puppet?

Obviously, at first glance, this Kevin Youkilis puppet looks cute and cuddly, but peer into its cold, lifeless eyes and let them draw you in and I have to tell you, hoo boy, I’m getting far worse chills than I ever did from that damn creepy clown from Poltergeist. And that’s saying something.

Perhaps some of you will disagree, and say that there’s no way this lovable-looking bearded puppet which is a spot-on representation of the Red Sox infielder has hardly any quality which could be deemed sinister or spooky, but let me ask you this: would you want this thing sitting in the corner of your room, let alone lying underneath your bed? Think about it. Crap, I’d rather spend a terrifying, restless evening trying to get a little shuteye while Mr. Marbles hauntingly roams the hallways.

(shudders)

[H/T Getting Blanked (via Off the Bench)]