Sportress of Blogitude

Rapture Now: Flash Mob Tries To Convince Ellen DeGeneres To Become A Thunder Fan

Sweet Jesus. Kill me now. Seriously, can the Rapture just come a day or two early? Because this is about the saddest thing I have ever seen. What follows is the brief intro from The Oklahoman about the above video, with a few additions added by yours truly:

A big crowd of lonley miserable people with apparently no life practices dance steps Wednesday after leaving their fourteen cats at home during a flash mob dance tribute to the excruciatingly annoying Ellen DeGeneres at Hafer Park in Edmond. The event’s organizers, when not writing horse-themed poetry and reading Parade Magazine, are the co-administrators of the “Let’s Make Ellen our No. 1 Thunder Girl” Facebook page, because what sense would there be to be a fan of the Oklahoma Thunder if some overrated, spastic dancing comic does not share the same opinion? These Degenerate DeGeneres Dolts have sucked the soul out of sports blogger Weed Against Speed, and extinguished any semblance of faith in humanity that still existed within him.

Yeah, I think my additions made the paragraph more interesting. And much more accurate. Now I have no choice but to pull for the Dallas Mavericks. At least that team has German DJs in their corner.

Ooh! And look! Ellen took notice! SQUEE!

Stepping up efforts to make Ellen a Thunder fan [The Oklahoman]