Sportress of Blogitude


In Russian Soccer, Contract Breaks You!

Okay, okay, perhaps that title is a bit of a stretch, but do you know how hard it is to make a well-crafted Yakov Smirnoff reference in this day and age? Pretty bloody difficult, I’ll tell you that. Further, while the contract did not technically break Nikola Nikezic, a player for Russian Premiere League club Kuban Krasnodar, he alleges that a couple of armed thugs did threaten to lay a severe beatdown on Nikezic at the team’s headquarters in an attempt to violently coerce him into terminating his contract. Nikezic claims that he has fallen out of favor with the team and this was the club’s attempt to convince him that the grass is always greener on the other side of the handicapped parking spot.

Via The Seattle Times:

Nikezic also says in a video message on a website that the men had guns and threatened to “make an invalid” out of him. He says he signed a contract termination out of fear for his life.

Wow. Sounds prettay prettay prettay prettay rough. The worst part? When the armed thugs raised their fists in a demonstration of how they might savagely work him over, Nikezic flopped to the ground, holding his ankle.

Yep. Yakov Smirnoff + soccer flop joke = Sportress of Blogitude Soccer Commentary. But really, what kind of twisted individuals are running this Kuban Krasnodor soccer club? It’s like Luca Brasi is in charge of security or something.

Player says he was beaten into breaking contract [The Seattle Times]