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PGA Golf

Talk About An Occupational Hazard: Pro Golfer Ian Poulter Is Allergic To Grass

"Damn you, fescue! Damn you straight to hell!"

Well, that can’t be good, can it? Professional golfer and noted fancy boy Ian Poulter, who is currently in Florida competing in the WGC-Cadillac Championship, admitted on Twitter recently that after consulting doctors due to some itchiness on his back, it was concluded that he is allergic to grass. Yep. Grass. That stuff he spends nearly every waking moment of his life strolling across, picking up and tossing in the air in order to act like how fast and how far the blades fly have an effect on how he will hit his next shot.

So funny I’m allergic to every type of grass apart from 1 quality effort that. And All trees apart from 3. Chuffed to pieces

Wait. Chuffed? Does that term mean the same thing in England as it does here stateside? Because if so, is Poulter implying that he vomited due to his grass allergies? Come on, Ian, rub some sod in it and move on.

Still, how weird is that? A golfer allergic to grass. That’s like a butcher being allergic to meat. A baker who is allergic to gluten. A candlestick maker who discovers he’s allergic to wax. Rub-a-dub-dub, etc. Or a blogger who is allergic to Bagel Bites and slacking off…I mean, can you imagine?

Ian Poulter reveals he is allergic to grass [The Guardian]