Sportress of Blogitude

Cheesy: Nickname Options For Packers’ D-Line In Journal-Sentinel Poll Are Awful

For some unknown reason, we feel the need to make up nicknames for everything and everyone: buddies (Schmitty), power celebrity couples (I’m not going to degrade myself with providing an example), genitalia (The Octagon), what have you. The fascination with providing a nickname for stuff is all the more pervasive in sports. We cannot just call something or someone by its name, especially when it involves a defensive unit: The Steel Curtain, The Purple People Eaters, The Doomsday Defense, etc.

But at least in those above examples, those squads achieved an incredible level of success before a nickname was bestowed upon them. Apparently, the Green Bay Packers defensive line need a nickname, although in my estimation, while doing an admirable job, haven’t risen to the level of nickname-worthy status. The Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel apparently does not agree with my assessment and has decided to have a little fun with it by conducting a poll to ascertain what its readers feel is the best nickname for the Packers D-Line. The options:

  • The Bay of Bigs
  • Beef and Cheddar
  • The Big Cheese
  • The Cheddar Curtain
  • Gang Green
  • Gold Crush
  • Great Wall of Cheddar
  • The Green Giants
  • The Phat Pack
  • The Ton-Dra

Ugh. Not a quality option among them, although it’s nice to see that cheese was well represented. Not that I have any better ideas which proves a point: a nickname should evolve on its own, not as part of a fan poll. But as a hopeful Vikings fan who has decided the Bears going to the Super Bowl is the lesser of two evils, I’d like to throw this one out there for Green Bay’s defensive line: Velveeta, because it melts down easily when the heat is on.

What nickname would you give the Packers’ defensive line? [Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel]