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Wake N’ Blog: In Russia, Prisons Tan You!

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, etc. to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• Yeah, I have never quite gotten a hold of how to do those “In Russia” jokes, in case you couldn’t tell. Damn you, Yakov Smirnoff! Anyway, here’s the scoop: Moscow’s Butyrskaya prison, one of Russia’s most notorious prisons, will be installing tanning beds as part of its 240th anniversary celebration to help compensate for the inadequate sunlight in inmates’ cells. Now the prisoners will have to think about sunburn and skin cancer. You would think the weightlifting and the sodomy is enough. [Yahoo!/AP]

• Aaron Rodgers is absolutely owning the playoffs… [Larry Brown Sports]

• …but did he snub a cancer patient? [Foul Balls]

• Bart Scott’s post-game interview last night was awesome. [Deuce of Davenport]

• Uh-oh, Tommy from Quinzee is in “Fack You” mode. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

• Man finishes last in fantasy football league, forced to get ridiculous tattoo. [Off the Bench]

• Steelers fan heckles Ray Lewis with a blown up photo of his murder charge mug shot. [Busted Coverage]

• The six most annoying members of the New York Jets. [Mondesi’s House]

• Taking a gander at the headlines about the Jets-Pats game this morning… [Joe Sports Fan]

• I’m inclined to agree: this is most certainly a broken backboard. [Sharapova’s Thigh]

• Good read: the NFL Broadcasting Manifesto. [Awful Announcing]

• Hard shove ignites huge Serbian basketball brawl. [Bob’s Blitz]

• Albert Pujols to the Cardinals: show me the money. [Babes Love Baseball]

• Oregon’s new basketball arena is totally trippy, dude. [TAUNTR]

• Apropos of nothing, Gourmet Spud would like to point out the resemblance between Lakers player Shannon Brown and Nermal, the kitten from Garfield. [Food Court Lunch]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Area Fry-Cook Learns Leaving Restaurant Industry Isn’t That Easy