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Wake N’ Blog: ‘A Christmas Story’ Redux – Oklahoma Kid Gets His Tongue Stuck On Pole

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• And yes, he did it on a dare. No word is if it was a triple dog dare or just a run of the mill double dare. Speaking of double dare, how about that Marc Summers on Unwrapped on Food Network. He’s done very well for himself. I’m sure he never stuck his tongue on a pole. Wait, that doesn’t sound right. [Yahoo!/AP]

• The fellas over at TBJ have a little fun with who is the new sponsor of the Sacramento King’s arena. [The Basketball Jones]

• My pal Ryan over at Yardbarker teaches 49ers tight end Vernon Davis the five steps of blogging. [Yardbarker]

• Despite all the nice things which have been said recently about TCU, they never would have gone undefeated in the PAC-10 or the SEC. [Larry Brown Sports]

• Auburn may have won the game, but Oregon fans won the contest for the best sign at the game. [Busted Coverage]

• Sounds like a steal: three Oregon cheerleaders for $150. [Bob’s Blitz]

• Sweet fancy Moses, Blake Griffin’s alleged girlfriend is one piece of ayce. [Ted Williams Head]

• Hey look, LeBron being a sanctimonious a-hole. [The Last Angry Fan]

• Inspired by Saturday’s demonstration of Beast Mode, a celebration of some stellar stiff arms. [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

• The top 10 reasons there will not be an NFL lockout. [Five Tool Tool]

• Behold: the Mike Ditka Tree. [Foul Balls]

• Kobe Bryant got to meet golden-voiced former homeless guy Ted Williams, presumably before he was brought into questioning by police. [That NBA Lottery Pick]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Fully Validated Kanye West Retires To Quiet Farm In Iowa