Sportress of Blogitude

College Football

An Excerpt From A Soon-To-Be EDSBS X-Mas Classic: Craig James & The Magical Christmas Shed

In the spirit of the holiday season, please gather the young ones around and read them this delightful tale, courtesy of the holidazzling Spencer Hall of Every Day Should Be Saturday…but this is only an excerpt, you see. If you would like to read the entire story – and why wouldn’t you? – please travel through the tubes to EDSBS!

Craig James: You! Your Christmas is going great, but do you want it to go greaterer? Do you want to do Jesus birthday right? Do you not do Jesus birthday? Why not? Don’t you believe in Jesus? Katy Perry, don’t you believe in Jesus?

Katy Perry: Presents! Who are you?

Craig James: Ha ha that is a good question, Kately. I’m Craig James, football star and television personality.

Katy Perry: You played basketball? I LOVE BASKETBALL.

Craig James: That’s right, Cary. And I also love Christmas.

Katy: I love it too! My husband got me a special gift for Christmas!

[Perry begins squirting whipped cream from her boob-cannons]

Star-divide

Craig James: WOOO! Hey, Katy, stop it! You’re gonna get whipped cream all over our presents here!

Perry: But it’s not whipped cream!

Craig James: Then what is it?

[Silence. Staring.]

Craig James: I’ve got a Christmas album, and I think you’re going to love it. Tell ’em about it, Carrie!

Katy Perry: It’s called Cain Jaigs Christmas Shit!

Craig James: That’s right, it’s Craig James’ Christmas Shed, a collection of my renditions of classic Christmas songs.

Katy Perry: You’ll get songs like this!

***

Now that, my friends, well, that’s just festive wonderfulness. And there’s much, much more where that came from. Just you wait and see how this delightful little Christmas story concludes. Please, do yourself a favor and click on through here.

And please have yourselves a Merry Little Christmas from all your friends here at Sportress of Blogitude! Well, it’s just me, actually. Weed Against Speed. Yes, you know me.

Happy Holidays!!!