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Wake N’ Blog: This Never Would Have Happened On Library Investigation Officer Bookman’s Watch

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions, comments and complaints to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• A 42-year-old Alabama woman was arrested Wednesday on felony theft charges relating to theft of books from a public library. Regina M. Smith has been accused of stealing 222 books valued at $5,432 over the past couple of years from area libraries. Maybe that’s how she gets her kicks. Her and her good time buddies. Well I got a flash for ya, joy-gal: Party time is over. [Yahoo!/AP]

• Derek Anderson’s “Not Funny” rant auto-tuned. [Ted Williams Head]

• Gus Johnson truly is a gift that keeps on giving. [Awful Announcing]

• In case you missed it, “Heinz Juice Come Out Of Ben’s Smellspot” last night. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

• The Green Bay Packers throwback uniforms were certainly something. [Larry Brown Sports]

• This Gingerbread Fenway Park is awesome. No one denies this! [The Last Angry Fan]

• Is Bryce Harper a witch? [TheWizWit]

• The Cincinnati Bearcats mascot had an interesting weekend. [Busted Coverage]

• Here is video of Chiefs right tackle Barry Richardson punching his coach. [Bob’s Blitz]

• Nice: basketball player Josh Childress had poop thrown at him while playing in Greece. [Out of Bounds]

• Where are they now? “White Reggie Bush.” [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

• Here’s how it might have gone when Joakim Noah and John Elway shared a steam room last week. [TAUNTR]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Sullen Time-Traveling Teen Reports 23rd Century Sucks