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Breaking News: Lee Corso’s Head Recovered, Our Long National Nightmare Is Now Over

Okay, okay, to be fair, it wasn’t that long of a national nightmare: two days, to be exact, but it sure felt like longer. The sleepless nights worrying about Erin Andrews was enough to drive me straight over the edge. Whew. Glad that’s over.

Good news by the way of a report from The Oregonian: Lee Corso’s ginormous fake head has been found and we can now get back to a regular life, safe from the worries about what vile things that were being done to the replica of Corso’s melon. Kinky stuff. Sick stuff.

OSP’s Lt. Jeff Lanz said an Oregon State University employee called police this morning to say the giant head, worth approximately $5,000, was found near his car at his Harrisburg home. ESPN told police that the massive (some would say, scary) head was taken about 3:20 p.m. on Saturday, not long before the Ducks ended the game with a 37-20 victory over the Beavers.

Lanz said the mascot head was last seen in a large container box at the Oregon State University Memorial Union Quad near some ESPN transportation vehicles.  ESPN workers were clearing the College Game Day set when the mascot head was noted missing from its box.

Well, I guess all’s well that ends well, although we may never discover the identity of the person who caused the nationwide panic. Perhaps it’s better this way. Do we really want to know anything about the guy who likely performed unspeakable, depraved and perverted sex acts while wearing a Lee Corso head? I’d rather not.

Stolen giant head of ESPN’s Lee Corso recovered by OSU employee [The Oregonian]