Sportress of Blogitude


Go Get Wasted* At A Boston Bar With The Monday Night Football Crew

Ain’t no party like a Monday Night Football crew party because a Monday Night Football crew party, um, gets broken down in the film room by Jaws?

To be honest, I have no idea what really occurs at a standard Monday Night Football crew party – although I have a pretty good idea…Mike Tirico. But this event is not intended to be a regular crew party anyway. It’s for charity. This coming Saturday evening (December 4th), with MNF in town for the Jets-Patriots clash, the Monday Night Football crew will be meeting up at “The Greatest Bar” in Boston to “raise a glass” for the Graham Hale Gardner Foundation, charity which benefits “children with disabilities and give them the opportunity to experience ‘life adventures.'”

The particulars (via ESPN Media Zone):

Cynthia Gardner, stylist for the MNF crew since 2006, established the foundation in memory of her son Graham, who suffered from disabilities and passed away this past summer. The auction and fundraiser is open to the public ($25 cover charge) and will include special guests, Mike Tirico, Ron Jaworski, Jon Gruden, Michele Tafoya and Suzy Kolber. Up for auction will be sports memorabilia from NFL greats Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, Brett Favre, Drew Brees and more. Be sure to arrive early, only the first 150 guests will be allowed through the door.

What an absolutely heartbreaking story about Miss Johnson’s son, and all credit goes out to the entire MNF gang for lending their support to such a worthwhile cause. I imagine those 150 spots will go fast, so anyone in the Boston area who would like to go, I would follow the release’s advice and show up early.

Moving on, as a “humor” blog – I know, that might be surprising to many of you out there – it is my duty to, while showing proper respect for the event, interject a little but of fun, so below are my guesses as to what will be in the glasses which are raised by each member of the MNF talent:

Ron Jaworski: scotch, perhaps a Glenfiddich single malt – complex flavors, perfect for overanalysis and long-winded interpretation

Jon Gruden: now this guy, this guy likes something straight up and simple, a drink that doesn’t require too much thought – Jack Daniels on the rocks

Michelle Tafoya: a Minnesotan gal, so I’m going with a Twin Cities microbrew, perhaps a Summit Extra Pale Ale

Suzy Kolber: a Virgin Mary – I mean, is there anybody who knows anything about this baby of hers?

Mike Tirico: Roofie Colada – duh.

In all seriousness, though, best of luck to everyone involved. Let’s hope they raise a lot of money.

* probably not the best idea to show up and get fall down drunk – there will likely be loads of security – but hey, it’s a free country

Raise a Glass with the MNF crew Saturday Night in Boston [ESPN Media Zone]