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Wake N’ Blog: Just In Time For Thanksgiving, ‘Gluttony Pants’

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• Celebrity chef Chris Cosentino has invented “Gluttony Pants,” which feature three buttons so a person can expand the waistline of their slacks as they overeat.  Said Cosentino: “There have been some misconceptions about the Gluttony Pants — I’m not trying to promote obesity or overeating, it’s more about fun. It’s not always a bad thing to overindulge — I’m not saying sit down and eat a 100-ounce T-bone, but it’s OK to overdo it once in a while.” Wait. Is he saying there is something wrong with eating a 100-ounce T-bone? This guy…this guy doesn’t get it. [MSNBC]

• Shocking: Steve Young ripped Vince Young. When is this guy not hammering on someone? Bitter man, this Steve Young fella. [Larry Brown Sports]

• Uh-oh: Ron Artest, who aspires to play professional football one day, to receive advice on how to be a malcontent in the NFL from Terrell Owens. [Sharapova’s Thigh]

• The Dallas Mavericks are selling a cookbook. TBJ comes up with some hilarious recipes which should have been included in it. [The Basketball Jones]

• Is the impending divorce of Tony Parker and Eva Longoria one of the reasons Derek Jeter has wisely chosen to remain single? [Outside the Boxscore]

• The fact that Rajon Rondo is averaging over 14 assists per game is simply mind-blowing. [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

• Who knew Don King was a Miami Heat fan? Further, who knew he was among the walking dead? [Ball Don’t Lie]

• Opponents are accusing an African female soccer player of not being a female. [Out of Bounds]

• A “Ray Lewis Dance-Off” proved what we all knew all along: white folks can’t dance (like Ray Lewis). [The Last Angry Fan]

• Last night marked the transition of Phillip Rivers from Marmalard to Fun-Loving Marmalard. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Man Gives Up Trying To Get Coat Back From Former Girlfriend