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Sportress of Blogitude

Officials On The Lookout For A Kung-Fu Kicking, Vandalizing Female Bruins Fan

Officials are searching for a woman who vandalized a pillar in a restroom at the new Boston Garden. While her considerable karate skills cannot be denied, what she did amounted to willful damage of property and if caught, will likely be ordered to pay restitution, which kind of sucks for her, because I’m pretty sure she won’t be able to use martial arts to kick her way out of that situation. At least I think she won’t be able to…but the gal’s got skills, so who knows?

Via CBS Sports:

Boston Bruins spokesman Matt Chmura said building officials found the damage in their postgame sweep after Saturday night’s game against the St. Louis Blues. They are trying to identify and locate the woman, whose face is clearly shown in the video.

In the video, a woman in a Milan Lucic Bruins T-shirt kicks a hole in a support pillar in the bathroom.

Then she falls down.

Well, of course she fell down. Did you see the brute force she summoned when kicking that thing? What’s that? Oh yeah. I guess if this is the first time you have read or heard about this story, you have unlikely seen the video. You can see it over on Deadspin, but my friends at TAUNTR have also converted it into delightful animated GIF form, which follows.

Awesome. Her impeccable form in the way she squares up and pushes straight through the pillar reminds of one of my favorite arcade games from my youth, Karate Champ. If I remember correctly, the move demonstrated by Vandalizing-Kung-Fu-Kick-Then-Falls-Down-On-Her-Ass-Bruins-Fan-Gal could be accomplished by pushing both joysticks in the same direction, towards your opponent, which causes me to reminisce and remember how cool that game was back in the day. Even more, how awesome would it have been if she would have done some forward somersaults (left joystick up, right joystick down) while jumping over an onrushing stampede of angry bulls before she did a jumping side kick (left joystick up, right joystick right) into the pillar? Bad ass. Ah, who am I kidding? She was at a hockey game, not a rodeo. Why would there have been bulls in the ladies restroom in the first place?

Boston Garden officials looking for female vandalizing fan [CBS Sports]
Lady Hockey Fan Has Superpowers When Drunk [Deadspin]
Gif: Drunk Bruins Fan Fail [TAUNTR]