Sportress of Blogitude

OMG! Clinton Portis Wore A Phillies Cap And The Redskins Play The Eagles On Monday!

Oh, the humanity! Won’t somebody please think of the children! The world is going to hell in a handbasket and Clinton Portis is carrying that handbasket with the world in it while wearing a Phillies cap! Gah! Janky Spanky!

Man, that Clinton Portis. Who woulda thunk a guy as mild-mannered as Portis, who abhors the spotlight, mind you, go and pull a stunt like this? Crazy, I know, but there he was, earlier today, wearing a Phillies hat. What makes this display particularly shameful is that the Redskins play the Eagles – who are also from Philadelphia! – on Monday night!

(please reread the first paragraph of this post to reiterate the utter zaniness of it all now)

Okay. Back with me? Good. But why, oh why, would Portis do this? What is he trying to prove by thumbing his nose at his franchise and the geographical location where they play by wearing a hat from a team that just so happens to share the same geographical location of a team that the team Portis plays for also comes from?

(eyes roll back in head)

Wait, what was I getting at? Oh yeah, why Portis was wearing a Phillies cap: he was in a “red” sort of mood today. I see.

D.C. Sports Bog reports:

“I just felt like wearing red today,” he said, when asked. “It didn’t have nothing to do with the Phillies. I just felt like wearing red today. This was the only outfit I had, so I put it on.”

Red, though, could also be Nats, it was pointed out.

“I don’t have a Nats hat,” Portis said. “That’s crazy that I don’t have a Nats hat. Nobody has sent me one to the locker room.”

A perfectly reasonable explanation. How can a person wear a hat he does not own? And why hasn’t the Nationals organization provided Portis with one? I think we should all step back, stop pointing fingers at Portis – he’s the victim here, people – and instead call out the Nationals for their horrific bumbling of this situation.

Clinton Portis’s Phillies hat [D.C. Sports Bog]