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PGA Golf

It Looks Like Tiger Woods’ Tournament Could Be A Good Old-Fashioned Whoredown

If there were such a thing as inslut repellent (motto:  “Off! Inslut Repellent: Kind of like insect repellent, but for sluts!”),  the organizers of Tiger Woods’ upcoming tournament would have been strongly advised to stock up on several 55-gallon drums of the stuff considering the most recent news about a few unwelcome guests who are apparently planning on showing up.

You see, TMZ is reporting that three of Tiger’s more attention-whorish of his many alleged paramours – Joslyn James, Holly Sampson and Jamie Jungers – intend to make an appearance, presumably leaving snail tracks along the way – at his tournament, the Chevron World Challenge, which will be held from November 30 – December 5 at the Sherwood Country Club in Thousand Oaks, California.

And if the presence of these washed-up, used-up skanks wasn’t enough, TMZ also reports that two of the harlots will have “new boobs” in time for the tournament, so that’s…something.

But seriously, enough is enough.These broads need to slink back to the holes from which they originally emerged when their alleged dalliances with Tiger first came to light. Somebody should tell these skanks that their moments in the spotlight have long passed their expiration dates. If I had the chance, I would sit them down – well, first I would make sure to put on a Hazmat suit, obviously – and inform them that it’s over. Go back to their homes on Whore Island…or whatever.

I mean, take a look at them – they’re borderline disgusting. I can’t say for certain, but I’m pretty sure my browser was just infected with Chlamydia by simply having these images open in it. If I were you, I’d run a scan, too, just as a precaution.

Tiger Woods — Mistresses Still Chasing His Putter [TMZ]