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Hockey

When Wronged, Canadian Street Hockey Enthusiasts Can Be A Vandalistic Bunch

Weird. Who would ever have suspected that Canadians take their hockey so seriously that when a couple living in a cul-de-sac in Nova Scotia complained that the kids playing street hockey in front of their house were encroaching on their property, they would be greeted with not only derision, but vandalism? And here I thought Canadians kind of liked hockey but it wasn’t a part of their entire national identity. Most peculiar.

To wit: Ray Warren and Donna Beeler believe that their house has been egged and the air has been let out of their cars’ tires recently in retaliation for Beeler calling the authorities a couple of weeks ago to complain that eight or so kids playing street hockey in front of her home were being noisy. Saying that her home is now located in “the neighbourhood from hell,” Beeler’s complaint set off a chain of events which included a Mountie showing up in their Prospect neighborhood to order the kids to stop playing and culminated in a spate of vandalism which has left Warren and Beeler worried about what is going to happen next. My suggestion: deportation. These people are clearly not true Canadians.

Unfortunately for the street hockey players, the law appears to be on the side of these self-loathing Canadian impostors. Players can be fined up to $394 for violating “a section of the provincial Motor Vehicle Act that deals with pedestrians failing to yield.”

You know what? That does it. I don’t even know who Canadians are anymore. What’s more, I’m shocked they haven’t enacted a “Game On” provision to the Motor Vehicle Act which would allow street hockey players and the hockey-hating doppelgangers posing as Canadians to co-exist in peace. At least until pissers and moaners such as Ray Warren and Donna Beeler are sent to Canuckistani Reeducation Camps. It’s for their own damn good.

Road hockey complainers hit by vandals [CBC]