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Wake N’ Blog: He Who Has Not Thrown Dog Poop At A Passing Motorist Cast The First Turd

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, link submissions and anecdotes regarding the throwing of animal feces to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• A Massachusetts woman, believing a motorist was speeding, hurled a bag of doggie doo at the driver, striking the person in the face. Via an AP report: “Belmont Lt. Rick Santangelo said the woman initially contacted police last week and reported that she was walking her dog when she saw the motorist nearly hit a man on a bicycle…Santangelo said the motorist contacted police the next day to report being struck in the face with dog feces…The woman was charged with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon, vandalism to property and disorderly conduct.” Wait. Dog poop is considered a dangerous weapon? What caliber was this crap? [Yahoo!/AP]

• Best soccer anthem ever. It is also the only soccer anthem I am aware of, making the determination that it’s the best ever much easier. [Out of Bounds]

• Ben Roethlisberger contemplated retirement? Based on his decision to return, he should have done more contemplating. [Larry Brown Sports]

• Reggie Evans appears to have quite the affinity for other men’s buttocks. [Bob’s Blitz]

• Robin Williams tries to get the San Francisco Giants pumped up for the postseason. Wha? [The Sporting Rave]

• Solve at least some of your life’s problems by reading KSK’s Sex/Fantasy Football Mailbag. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

• BC gets us pumped up for a big weekend on the gridiron with these photos of Victoria Silvstedt tossing around the old pigskin while wearing a bikini. [Busted Coverage]

• My pal Gourmet Spud knocks it out of the park with the Punchable Faces of Donald Trump. [Food Court Lunch]

• Does India’s Chief Minister of Dehli, Sheila Dikshit have the best name ever? That very well could be the case. [Ted Williams Head]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Historians Admit To Inventing Ancient Greeks