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NASCAR

Joe Gibbs Relies Heavily On ‘Christianity As Sport’ Metaphors For Talk With SC Inmates

Always willing to spread the Good Word, NFL coaching legend and NASCAR icon Joe Gibbs addressed a group of 600 inmates from South Carolina today and informed them that religion is a means through which they can turn their lives around. But instead of going with a straightforward approach, Gibbs decided that in order to truly get through to these convicts, he better go with some sports metaphors. Fair enough, but in my opinion, he got a little too heavy-handed with his “Christianity as Sport” metaphors. Via The Miami Herald/AP:

Gibbs spoke Tuesday in the sweltering yard of the Turbeville Correctional Institution. He told inmates they should choose to play for God, who is on the winning team. Gibbs says inmates should follow the rules of life laid out in the Bible, which he called the playbook.

So, let me get this straight. In Gibbs metaphorical world where football is easily translated into Christianity, Drew Brees has got to be Jesus, right? If the Bible is a spiritual playbook, does that mean the Book of Revelation is where all the trick plays would be located? And what happens if God decides to institute a lockout right on the eve of the End of Days? What then? Does humanity have any kind of collective bargaining agreement with God to protect our interests or not? So many questions.

And why did Coach Gibbs stop there? Why didn’t he say that in way, baptism into the Christian faith is a lot like a soak in the ice tub after a heated spiritual battle on the Godiron? Or even better, he should have just told them that salvation could be theirs if only they would accept Jesus Christ as their fantasy football team’s starting quarterback. You know, with fantasy sports enjoying such tremendous popularity these days, my guess is that angle would have went over like gangbangers. Er, I mean gangbusters.

NASCAR icon Gibbs tells SC inmates to trust God [The Miami Herald/AP]