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No ‘Totally Naked Except Her Pubic Area’ For Uchitel: Tiger Nixes Playboy Shoot

Sorry guys, you won’t be able to ogle at photos Rachel Uchitel nude anytime soon after Tiger prevented Harem Member #1 from appearing in a “totally naked except for her pubic area” photo shoot for Playboy. As an aside, does it really matter whether or not she was nude save for the pubic area? Take a look at the above photo. Cripes, if Marlee Matlin had glaucoma she could still read those lips.

A hefty $300k paycheck was on the table for Uchitel to grace the cover of the men’s magazine, but according to a report, Tiger threatened to take away her multi-million dollar settlement from him if she did the photo spread.

Via the New York Post:

“It put Rachel in significant danger of losing the millions of dollars Tiger paid her,” a source told “The magazine wanted to mention Rachel’s relationship with Tiger, but it would have jeopardized the deal she already made with him.

“They refused to give her complete control of the cover so she could make sure Tiger wasn’t mentioned.”

Boy, I know how that goes. There is absolutely nothing worse than having stipulations agreed to under a previous contract prevent you from posing nude for a respected publication. Not that I wasn’t flattered by Totally Nude Blogger Quarterly’s lucrative offer to be their first coverboy. It was a much-appreciated boost to my self-esteem when I needed it the most. Although after reviewing a mock-up of their debut issue, I could see why the publishers did not plan to publish it monthly. The paleness is damn near blinding.

Tiger blocks former gal pal Rachel Uchitel from posing for Playboy [New York Post]