Sportress of Blogitude

Blatant Homerism

Yay! Brett Favre Has Been Offered Another Endorsement Opportunity Because He’s Old!

Suck it, Just For Men, Brett Favre has been offered a $1 million dollar payday if he agrees to use Go Away Gray™, an anti-graying hair treatment in pill form.

From a press release (via Randball):

There’s a new pill that makes gray hair disappear, promising to reverse and prevent gray hair at the root. Rise-N-Shine, LLC, makers of Go Away Gray™, produce an all-natural pill containing the enzyme Catalase, which replaces the decreasing amounts of Catalase lost in our bodies as we grow older. Featured on ABC News, BBC, NBC and FOX, the company wants to spread the word by offering $1,000,000 to Brett Favre to get rid of his gray hair for five consecutive years.

The product was developed by Cathy Beggan, a mother of three and long-time proponent of natural remedies: “When Anderson Cooper didn’t accept our offer last month (after all, he’s a Vanderbilt), we decided to go after somebody that was going to be in the public eye week after week, reaching our core audience. And it doesn’t help that he’s an athletic and handsome devil.”

Well, there is no denying that the ol’ Gunslinger is one handsome devil, as they put it, but only $1 million over five years? That’s bush league money as far as Favre is concerned. Let me do the math here…(carry the one, take the derivative, multiply by pi…

Hey! That’s only $200,000 per year! Obviously, the Go Away Gray™ folks did not follow Favre’s extorting the Vikings for a buttload of money to return this season.

How far is Madison Avenue willing to play out this “Brett Favre Is Old” advertising angle? First it was that Hyundai commercial, now this? Speaking of buttloads, if I ever turn on the television and see Brett Favre doing a commercial for Depend undergarments…well, I won’t know what to do –  except laugh, of course. Because the thought of old people pooping their pants because they have no control over their bowels is hilarious. HA!

Uh-oh. In my uproarious laughter about poop, I think I just sharted myself. Oops.

TFD: $1 million for Favre to get rid of his gray hair [Randball]
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