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Dumbest. World. Record. Ever. Golfers To Try To Play ‘Fastest Round Of Golf’

In a coordinated effort, 100 golfers in Texas are going to attempt to play the fastest round of golf in Texas some time in October. But the thing is it isn’t so much the fastest round of golf as it is a bastardized version of a relay played out on a golf course, so I’m calling B.S. on the entire endeavor.

The group has been put together by Bill Toms, who lives in Oxnard, Calif. It includes Bill Lively, who lives in Webster and is an avid golfer in the area.

“We are going to be playing a 7,000-yard course in the Dallas area, but I don’t know what course yet,” said Toms, who spreads the players throughout the course in a relay-type fashion.

In 1993, Toms gathered a group of 77 players and broke the Guinness Book of World Records standard by playing a round in 10 minutes, 30 seconds on a 6,000-yard course in Bakersfield, Calif.

Stupid. In essence, all that is really going on is a bunch of golfers are going to stake out a spot on the course, wait for a ball to be hit by them and then go whack away at it to some other dolt at another location. That isn’t the fastest round of golf in any sense of the word. If I assembled 422 sprinters and placed them 100 meters apart on the route of a marathon and had each of them run their respective 100-meter portion, would that mean when they finished the result should be hailed as the “Fastest Marathon Ever Run”? Hell no. It would only mean that 422 people just wasted their time participating in a completely worthless pursuit. This entire fastest round of golf bit is easily the dumbest attempt World Record that does not involve thousands of ham-fisted mongoloids all wearing Snuggies at the same time.

18 holes in less than 10 minutes? Webster golfer in group seeking speediest round [Houston Chronicle]