Wake N’ Blog: Mmmmm…Condom Soup! Can I Get Mine With A Side Of Scabies?

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s morning link dump. Send tips, links and contraceptive-based recipes, preferably with diaphragms as the main ingredient to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• A man in California alleges that while dining with his family at an Easter brunch, he bit into a condom which was mysteriously immersed in his French onion soup, an event which prompted Zdenek Philip Hodousek to promptly sue the litigiously-named restaurant chain, Claim Jumper. Terms were not disclosed, but thankfully, because of the condom the soup was not impregnated. [Yahoo!/AP]

• Is there anything better than great moments in MLB history played out on RBI Baseball? I think not. [Out of Bounds]

• BC needs your help in locating a YouTube video of a Newcastle fan with his dong hanging out which was promptly pulled from the site. Sportress readers…ASSEMBLE! [Busted Coverage]

• UFC’s Arianny Celeste will pose for Playboy. Nice. [Larry Brown Sports]

• The Worldwide Leader in Censorship? ESPN pulls Rick Reilly video because he ripped Bud Selig. [Deadspin]

• Jayson Nix of the Cleveland Indians makes a nice catch, promptly falls on his head. [Bob’s Blitz]

• Oh, Raiders fans…yikes. [SB Nation]

• Wait. Cedric Benson is indispensable? Huh. [The Legend of Cecilio Guante]

• Phil Mickelson speaks up on Jim Furyk being DQ’d for oversleeping. [Waggle Room]

• The five best moments from episode 3 of Hard Knocks. [Kissing Suzy Kolber]

• The top 10 threats to fantasy football. [Five Tool Tool]

• The Onion Headline of the Day: Local Water Tower Celebrates 50th Year As Repository Of Information On Who Is A Slut