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The Panel From Cable Access Show ‘How Much Ya Bench?’ Reunited On ‘SportsNation’

As you can plainly see courtesy of the above slideshow, the behemoths who joined Michelle Beadle and Colin Cowherd on SportsNation yesterday are completely dedicated to body building and a steroid-free power lifting experience. Yep.

While I will freely admit that these freaks of nature could squash me like a bug and then – not that I would want them to, of course – nurse me back to health via their ability to lactate Muscle Milk, they look ridiculous. And while I did not see SportsNation yesterday, I can reasonably surmise that meatheads like these guys are so not Michelle’s cup of tea. She’s much more interested in intelligent, thoughtful and sensitive men who can make wisecracks on the internets, men much like myself. Hey, I’m man enough to admit I openly wept during The Notebook. SHE HAD ALZHEIMER’S AND HE NEVER LEFT HER SIDE, DAMMIT! (H/T Gourmet Spud). AND IF THERE’S ANYONE OUT THERE – ESPECIALLY YOU, COLIN COWHERD, YA NANCY BOY – WHO HAS GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT IS GONNA GET A BEATIN’!

All right. And let me say that what you’ve just read was a display of normal male envy and aggression, and in no way was the consequence of steroid abuse. Stay off the juice! The side effects aren’t worth it.

And for those of you out there who have no idea what the hell is going on here, below you will find the classic SNL skit, “How Much Ya Bench?”

Ha. Classic.

SportsNation gets Pumped Up [ESPN Media Zone]