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Wake N’ Blog: Firefighters Dismantle Police Car All For The Sake Of A Little Pussy

Wake N’ Blog is the Sportress of Blogitude’s super terrific morning link dump. Send tips, links and, uh, other stuff, to weedagainstspeed@gmail.com.

• Firefighters in Vienna had quite the conundrum on their hands when a kitten managed to evade them as they attempted to rescue it after it got stuck inside a police car’s engine area. “Firefighters and police finally struck paydirt after jacking up a police cruiser, then following the sound and tracing the wayward kitty to a small space inside the vehicle’s floor panel. But it took half an hour of elbow grease before the critter was nabbed and taken to an animal shelter.” Seems like a lot of work for a cat, but hey, I’m a dog person. [Yahoo!/AP]

• Oh no! Larissa Riquelme, a/k/a Paraguayan World Cup Hottie Superfan, was robbed by bandits in Rio. Just tell me here boobs were unharmed. [Out of Bounds]

• Congrats to Tampa Bay Rays pitcher Matt Garza on his no-hitter last night. [Big League Stew]

• And another congratulations goes out to You Been Blinded for being referenced on Pardon the Interruption. That’s awesome. [You Been Blinded]

• Hey, anyone up for a game of Super Orioles Bros? [TAUNTR]

• Chris Johnson tweeted something about he and Adrian Peterson pulling a Miami Heat when they both become free agents. Make it so, as long as it is the Minnesota Vikings assuming the role of the Heat. [Sharapova’s Thigh]

• The caretaker of Jimmy Johnson’s home was involved in a standoff with police and has been charged with sexual abuse of a minor. [Busted Coverage]

• Is too much being made of NFL QB contract extensions? [Larry Brown Sports]

• The first words out of an NYPD officer’s mouth after emerging from a coma were “Derek Jeter.” [Ted Williams Head]

• The top 13 running on the field moves. [Five Tool Tool]

• Chad OchoCinco is tired. [Outside the Boxscore]

• Some fancy schmantzy New York City restaurant just sold a hot dog for $69, breaking the world record for the most money some dumbass would pay for a fancy hot dog. [Bob’s Blitz]

• Better Def Leppard album: Hysteria or Pyromania? Definitely Pyromania in my book. [Food Court Lunch]

The Onion Headline of the Day: Do Glass Pipes, Incense Prove Teens Are Practicing Shamanism?