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What About Styling Gel And Loose Senior Ladies? Jimmy Johnson To Be On ‘Survivor’

Outwit. Outplay. Outparty.

In either one of the most brilliant or potentially fatal coups in the reality show’s history, sources are reporting that 67-year-old former Dallas Cowboys coach Jimmy Johnson will be among the contestants on the next edition of CBS’s Survivor, this one to be “played” (and by played, I mean “manipulated by the producers”) in Nicaragua. From ESPN Dallas:

The 67-year-old Johnson, who was unavailable for comment, joins the show’s 21st season this summer. The series has been taped in various exotic locations, including Panama, the Fiji Islands, Kenya and Brazil since it started in 2000. This year’s show will tape in San Juan del Sur, Nicaragua.

To be frank, I have probably seen one-half hour of one show of the long-running series, so my understanding of how the “game” is actually played is a bit limited. But given Johnson’s love of the finer things in life, such as hair product, Extenze, beer koozies and the loosest gals on the senior living community circuit, I have no idea how the NFL on FOX analyst will be able to make it far without the presence of his creature comforts. On the other hand, he survived the ’90s Cowboys and has figured out a way (chemically, no doubt) to put up with Howie Long and Terry Bradshaw, so who knows?

Just one piece of advice, Jimmy: with that hair helmet of yours, stay away from those torches during the tribal councils or whatever the hell they are called. If we thought Michael Jackson’s Pepsi commercial got ugly, we haven’t seen nothing yet…

“How ’bout ‘dem Cow…” (KA-PLOW!)

Source: Johnson joins cast of ‘Survivor’ [ESPN Dallas]
(previously at the Sportress: Former Cowboys Coach Jimmy Johnson Used To Be Concerned About The Size Of His Schlong)