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PGA Golf

Padraig Harrington? More Like Peepee Harrington, Amirite?

Necessary? Is it necessary for Padraig Harrington to test his own urine? Probably not, but he does it anyway because it’s sterile and he likes the smell.

In actuality, Padraig Harrington, as he prepares to begin his quest for a fourth major at the U.S. Open at Pebble Beach this week, leaves no stone unturned and no bodily fluid untested when it comes to determining his preparedness and fitness before heading out on the course. In fact, he routinely utilizes a device which tests his urine to determine if he’s keeping himself properly hydrated, a wise move with the players about to face the sweltering temperatures in California.

Some might say that the Irishman might be taking it a bit too far with the urine testing – he disagrees. From the worldwide leader in the field in hard-hitting analysis of the urinary habits of professional athletes, The Sun:

I never leave anything to chance. If you are relaxed and confident about your health and fitness, you play better golf.”

You see, the benefits of testing one’s own urine are twofold: for one thing, it provides an accurate assessment of the condition of your body; and two: is there any time when a man feels more relaxed and confident than immediately after taking a whizz? Especially if you can manage to do so under the prying eyes of other urinators in a public restroom. Hey, stage fright can be quite the embarrassing and debilitating affliction, wouldn’t you agree? No? Just me, huh? Liars.

Here Wee Go For Padraig [The Sun]