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Chris Berman Could…Go…All…The…Way (To A Star On The Hollywood Walk Of Fame)

Yep, the guy photographed above will be getting his very own star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame during a May 24th ceremony. Hopefully, he’ll run a comb through that mop before making his appearance.

Despite his shortcomings, Berman is a highly accomplished member of the media and has been at it for a mighty long time, so I suppose it makes sense to a certain extent, but still…Chris Berman? On the Walk of Fame? I can’t quite put my finger on it (nor would I want to), but there is something not quite right with that in my book.

Berman, of course, is extremely flattered by the recognition:

“A star on Hollywood Boulevard is an iconic honor that has literally blown me away,” said Berman.  “It speaks to 30 years of hard work for thousands of ESPN employees, and I am proud to represent each and every one of them.  I can assure you that this will be the only time that my name will be in a sentence with the likes of Clarke Gable and John Wayne.”

Not so fast, Berman. Here’s a sentence:

“Listening to Chris Berman’s tired shtick makes me wish I was a six feet under, much like Hollywood icons Clarke Gable and John Wayne.”

See? That wasn’t too hard. As a side note, Berman truly does appreciate the dedication of the thousands of ESPN employees he has worked with in the past…except for those dumb bastards he was stuck working alongside on Monday Night Football. JESUS!

As mentioned above, Berman has been around for eons and won numerous awards – something the press release from ESPN goes to great lengths in highlighting, but what I found most interesting is how they highlighted Berman’s rock ‘n roll lifestyle in the write-up:

A long-time aficionado of rock and roll, Berman has appeared on stage singing with Huey Lewis and the News more than a dozen times.  In addition, he sang twice with Eddie Money, appeared in a video with Hootie and the Blowfish, and was joined by Glenn Frey of the Eagles for a special “Hotel California” Super Bowl edition of “The Swami.”

Well, if working with Eddie Money can help a person score a star on the Walk of Fame, then where in the hell is Ronnie Spector’s? Be my little baby? Hello? I mean that’s so rude, I can’t believe that’s … that’s so goddamned rude. Why does everyone all of sudden feel they can go on ignoring the accomplishments of a friggin’ Ronnette? Two tickets to paradise my ass! JESUS! Somebody get Huey on the phone, pronto!

Chris Berman Gets Hollywood Walk of Fame Star [The Sporting Blog]
ESPN’s Chris Berman to Be Honored With Star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame [ESPN Media Zone]