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PGA Golf

Joslyn James Turning Into Whored Out Version Of A Deadhead

Much like the Grateful Dead fans of yesteryear, who would traipse around the country with their stinky, dirty hippiness and grilled cheese sandwiches, it appears Joslyn James has decided to follow their example. James apparently has decided she has no other choice but to hitch her wagon to something far bigger than her, follow it around from town to town in a shameful effort to provide direction and some sort of twisted meaning to her aimless, has-been life. I mean she’s 33 and a porn star. The expiration date on that overused cooter is almost upon her.

This must be why James has decided to go kicking and screaming into that empty life of pornographic irrelevance. According to the Charlotte Observer, James will be appearing at gentlemen’s club Uptown Cabaret on the dates of April 30th through May 1st. And lo and behold, by a cosmic twist of fate, a person once near and dear to her heart (and various bodily orifices) will also be in town for those dates on personal business: Tiger. Woods recently entered and will be competing in the Quail Hollow Championship in Charlotte the very same weekend. Who woulda thunk it, right? Talk about jizzmet! Er, kismet. Kismet was the word I was looking for.

As I am sure you recall, James also performed at Atlanta strip club Pink Pony, located just 50 miles away from Augusta National, during the Masters. This is becoming a bad habit for the washed-up starlet. Just like following Dead around became for those filthy hippies. But this cannot last forever for James. Before you know it, she will lose her way and end up following some second rate version of the real thing. Does anybody have an idea who the PGA’s version of the String Cheese Incident would be?

Former Tiger Woods mistress coming to Uptown Cabaret [Charlotte Observer]