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PGA Golf

Wait, Tiger Woods Was Nailing His Kindergarten Teacher?

(killer MS Paint job)

I suppose at this point, we shouldn’t allow anything to surprise us about Tiger Woods. But carrying on an affair with his kindergarten teacher while he was her student? Yuck. I’m sorry, but that’s way out of line – not as much for Tiger (for a change of pace), but for this sexual predator who posed as a teacher. And why is she hiring Gloria Allred?

(reads New York Daily News story)

Ohhhhh…I see.

While she is still doing primarily for the attention, the circumstances behind why she has decided to come forward at this point are not as contemptible as I had originally assumed.

Woods’ kindergarten teacher is being trotted before the cameras by celebrity lawyer Gloria Allred to weigh in on a story that has nothing to do with the golfer’s gallivanting behind his wife’s back.

Instead, the teacher – who Allred is keeping under wraps until the presser – is expected to rip a recollection from Woods that appeared in a book written by his buddy, former NBA star Charles Barkley.

In it, Woods recounted the brutal way he learned about racism on his first day of kindergarten in Cypress, Calif.

Wow. I was way off on this one. I apologize for the confusion, but when I read the headline of the story from the New York Daily News, “Tiger Woods’ kindergarten teacher hires celebrity lawyer Gloria Allred, vowing to tell her story,” what was I supposed to think? I mean, why would they use a headline which somewhat misrepresents the content of the story? Why would a person deliberately mislead people like that? Simply to lure people to their site for the potential of increased pageviews? Come on.  I’m sorry, but that’s just wrong.

Also, wrong: my horrible, horrible MS Paint atrocities. That’s some shaky tracing right there. But considering the DTs I am experiencing this morning, they could have been much, much worse.

Tiger Woods’ kindergarten teacher hires celebrity lawyer Gloria Allred, vowing to tell her story [New York Daily News]