Sportress of Blogitude


Cleverest Headline Ever

Pineapple Express


I have to give an imaginary gold star to the writer of this headline I discovered today on Reuters, because it satisfies three of my requirements for a solid, punny headline.

  1. A great pop culture reference;
  2. Informative; and most importantly
  3. Obvious incorporation of marijuana lingo.

Unbeknownst to yours truly, “Pineapple Express” is not only the name of the Peabody Award recipient and Newberry Medal-winning film starring Seth Rogen and James Franco, as well as a mythological strain of primo nugs which are given MacGuffin-like status in the movie; Pineapple Express is also some sort of actual meteorological phenomenon. Via Wikipedia:

“[Pineapple Express] is characterized by a strong and persistent flow of atmospheric moisture and associated heavy rainfall from the waters adjacent to the Hawaiian Islands and extending to any location along the Pacific coast of North America.”

Well I’ll be damned. But the real genius of this particular headline is how the writer – astutely, I might add – incorporates the world “buzz” when describing the anticipation for the Olympic Games, set to begin with Opening Ceremonies on February 12th. Apparently, this Pineapple Express weather pattern could severely disrupt the Olympics, due to the warm and wet conditions typically associated with this kind of weather front.

Cypress Mountain, host for freestyle skiing and snowboard competitions, was closed on Monday due to heavy rain and snow making halted as temperatures in Vancouver climbed to a balmy 11 degrees Celsius (52 Fahrenheit).

Work crews at the popular resort, located just 12 kilometers outside of Vancouver, have been busy stockpiling snow at higher elevations and said snow making would resume as soon as temperatures dropped.

Whistler, about 125 km from Vancouver and venue for all alpine skiing, cross-country and sliding events, was also facing a soggy week with rain and temperatures well above freezing set to remain in place until Sunday.

Wait. Cypress Mountain? As in, a mountain is just a big hill, so in a stretch you could call it Cypress Hill? Man, these Olympics are a friggin’ treasure trove of potential pot references. I suppose this was bound to happen when you have a bunch of snowboarders invited to an event.

But back to the headline. Well done, good sir or madam. Although, I might have went with “Pineapple Express is totally harshing Vancouver Olympics’ mellow” instead, this one was pretty solid.

Finally, just for shits and giggles:

“Pineapple Express” dampens Vancouver Olympic buzz [Reuters]