Before The Crippling Brain Damage Sets In, Evander Holyfield Would Like To TKO Global Warming
Evander Holyfield, who apparently is still boxing, will have a new nickname the next time he steps into the ring: The Lean Green Fighting Machine.
It appears that during periods of cognitive awareness, Holyfield has realized that something needs to be done about the environment, and who better than a washed-up, well-past-his-prime boxer to take up the cause?
“I guess I’m lean and green,” Holyfield said in a telephone interview with The Associated Press. “I’m pretty much going to do all I can to fight against global warming. I’ll see what I can do to help and try to help other people who want to do the same thing.”
Holyfield, who now is to boxing what Al Gore is to boring documentaries, is coming out against global warming with fists flying. He is building a 40-acre solar energy farm at his home in Atlanta as well as setting an acre aside for organic agriculture.
“A mission as big as this needs someone who is recognized through the whole world,” Holyfield said. “We as a people have to come together to save this planet.”
Very true. And when a person who is as known for getting his ear bitten off by Mike Tyson than anything else comes up and tells you to help clean up the environment, you damn well better listen.
Hopefully, Holyfield’s vision of a better environment is less deluded than his vision of where his boxing career is headed.
“I will be the undisputed heavyweight champion of the world,” he said, repeating a familiar pledge. “I’m sure I will be champion next year sometime.”
Next year sometime? Hey, that’s about when Holyfield will give up this whole saving-the-environment endeavor and move on to his next cause: figuring out how to not drool when he tries to remember his name.
I know I’ll be pulling for him.
Holyfield now lean, green [ESPN, AP]