Sportress of Blogitude

Denver Post Columnist Uses Inappropriate Metaphor To Describe John Elway’s Impending Nuptials

Elway Marriage Football

I’m sure Bill Husted, a columnist for The Denver Post, had the best intentions when he wrote a story about John Elway’s upcoming wedding to former Raiderette cheerleader (more like Cougarette, amirite?) Paige Greene this Saturday, but his utilization of John Elway’s penchant for comeback victories may have been a mistake. The opening paragraph of his column, to wit:

John Elway is going deep Saturday. The ultimate Home Game. The final Hail Mary.

Hey-ohhhh!! You’re goddamned right he’s going deep, buddy. Elway plans on burying his bone so far up in that coochie he’ll be able to tell his blushing (and grunting) bride which wisdom teeth she has had pulled.

Speaking of wisdom teeth, check out some of the chosen ones lucky enough to end up on the guest list:

A group of friends are flying to Idaho for the nups, including close pal Craig Andrisen, business partner Tim Schmidt, sportswriter Rick Reilly and their wives. With lotsa family coming, about 50 to 60 people are expected at the wedding.

Rick Reilly? I can’t wait to read Reilly’s 5,000 word opus about the beauty of second chances in love set among the beautiful landscapes of Idaho. With loads of dental jokes, of course.

Husted: Elway driving toward the altar this weekend [The Denver Post]