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Wake N’ Blog For August 18th: This Confirms It – 90% Of U.S. Paper Currency Has At One Or Another Been In A Strip Club

wake-n-blogMLB Roundup. Vladimir Guerrero hit two homers and had five RBI as the Angels beat the Orioles 8-5. Four Oakland pitchers combined to shut out the Yankees 3-0.  Aaron Rowand had four hits, including a homer, as the Giants routed the Mets 10-1. [MLB.com Scoreboard]

Major League Baseball. It went down to the wire, but the Washington Nationals signed number one overall pick Stephen Strasburg to a four-year contract worth about $15.1 million. [The Associated Press]

National Football League. New York Jets defensive end Shaun Ellis has been suspended for one game and fined $100,000 by the NFL  for violation of the league’s substance abuse policy related to a traffic stop in November where he was charged with possession of marijuana, speeding and driving without insurance. [The New York Times]

Do not be surprised if you see a bunch of strung out-looking people licking dollar bills. In a study of paper currency around the globe, a group of scientists have determined that up to 90% of U.S. paper currency has traces of cocaine on it. U.S. and Canadian currency has the highest levels (between 85 and 90 percent) while Chinese and Japanese currency had the lowest levels of contamination (between twelve and twenty percent). [AOL News]