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I Don’t Give A Crap If He Is Lance Armstrong, I’m Still Not Giving Him My Zip Code

lance_armstrongradioshack1Lance Armstrong has announced that he is partnering with Radio Shack to form a new cycling team which will begin racing in 2010.

“RadioShack has agreed to partner with us on this venture and ensure that this partnership and this team stays alive for years to come, continues to be at the head of the peloton,” Armstrong said in a video on his Livestrong Web site.

First question: There are still Radio Shacks?

Second question: Wasn’t Circuit City available?

What’s that? Really? They have closed down, too? Huh.

Of course, like everyone else that wishes to work with Lance Armstrong, Radio Shack has to pony up and help support Armstrong’s Livestrong Foundation and fight cancer or whatever.

“We have an incredible opportunity to leverage RadioShack’s connection to tens of millions of people to spread the Livestrong message,” Armstrong said. “Also, in cycling, the technology we use on our bikes matters — it allows us to compete at the highest level. It’s important to me to partner with a brand that understands the role technology plays in people’s lives.”

Well, here’s to a successful venture, Lance Armstrong and Radio Shack. Just one thing, Lance: whatever you do, don’t start buying gifts for your kids at that damn store. I’m still emotionally scarred from some of the shit my grandparents gave me for Christmas that they purchased at Radio Shack.

Yeah, real nice fucking “robot,” Gramps. Maybe if the following Christmas you would have thought to get me the 12 D batteries it took for the damn thing to work, I might have enjoyed playing with it.

God, I miss that guy.

No, he ain’t dead, he’s in prison for stealing batteries.

Armstrong announces Radio Shack-backed team for next year’s Tour [SI.com/AP]