Here He Comes, Here He Comes, Here Comes El Bastardo

Big roster news yesterday in the MLB, kiddos: the Philadelphia Phillies called up pitcher Antonio Bastardo and optioned John Mayberry to their Triple-A club in Leigh Valley.

How is this big news? Well, um…Bastardo was 2-2 with a 2.01 ERA in seven starts at Triple-A.

Not good enough? Shit, I got nothing either. To be honest, the only reason I even took the time to post this story was so I could embed “Here Come The Bastards” by Primus.

UPDATE: I suppose I should have mentioned that Bastardo won his Major League debut last night in Philly’s 10-5 win over San Diego. That’s relevant, right? If you haven’t noticed by now, I’m kind of a woodhead.

Oh, and in other funny name sports news, Kaka left AC Milan and signed a sixty-five million euro deal with Real Madrid.

Ha. Kaka. His name is another way to refer to poop.

Poop.

Phils promote Bastardo, send Mayberry to Triple-A [Sporting News/AP]
Bastardo magnifico in debut as Phillies beat Padres [The Philadelphia Inquirer]
Kaka signs for Real Madrid – radio [Yahoo!/AFP]