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Tennis

Well This Is Odd: Elena Dementieva Defeated Mario Batali To Reach Semifinals Of Tennis Tournament

elena-dementieva

Hey, I don’t make the news, I just report on it, “report” being a very kind word for what I do, of course. But here it is: Elena Dementieva, the lovely lady pictured above, defeated Mario Batali in a grueling three set match 6-2, 4-6, 2-3 to reach the semifinals in the Stuttgart’s WTA tournament.

You know, earlier today I mentioned I had no problem with Sarah Gronert playing against women despite the fact she’s a hermaphrodite, but allowing Mario Batali on the women’s tennis tour is flat-out ridiculous. Furthermore, I doubt the Iron Chef can move around the court very well at all, so what’s the point? Have you seen the guy?

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And how does he play tennis in thoes dreadful orange Crocs? It just doesn’t make sense on any level.

What’s that? (re-reads article) Ohhh, it’s Marion Bartoli. My mistake.

Damn those liquid lunches. Mark my words, that’s the last martini lunch I ever take part in. From this point forward, it’s only screwdrivers for this guy.

Dementieva, Kuznetsova in all Russia clash [AFP]